Stop Hiding. Wisdom from Carl Richards.

Regular readers of this blog will know that I hold Carl Richards in high esteem. His simple messages supported by drawings are always worth a look and a thought. This one is especially good. I seem to attract procrastinators (or perhaps they attract me), Carl’s words on the subject are most appropriate and I am happy to share.

You can find out more about Carl and sign up to his newsletter HERE

“There’s something you want to do. Maybe even something you need to do. And you’re not doing it.

The reason you’re not doing it is because you’re hiding.

The reason you’re hiding is because there is work to be done, and that work is either scary, or hard, or boring, or all of the above.

So instead, you’re reading your eighteenth book of the year on time management, tweeting about the economy, and Instagramming motivational pictures.

(Actually, you’re reading your emails. Don’t ask me how I know.)

Might I make a suggestion?

Just stop.

All of those are places to hide.

I repeat: There’s something you want to do. Maybe even something you need to do. And you’re not doing it.

Stop procrastinating. Stop looking for a new trick, a new #hack.

Take all that time and put it into just getting the work done.

It’s that simple.”

-Carl

 

…and I thought self control was always a good thing.

Sometimes you have to admit that everything you thought was wrong was (possibly) right. Could it be that all those good habits, all that resisting temptation and weeks of denial were for nothing?

Is it possible that beating myself up after the third chocolate digestive and saying “no” to things that would have been fun but would have distracted me from my goals may well have done me more good than harm?

I now find out that there is a “Dark Side” to self control. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Kokoris and Stavrova point out the downsides of resisting temptation.

It is true that people with strong self control have better health, relationships, finances and careers and fewer problems with overeating, overspending, procrastination and unethical behaviour.

However there is a downside:

Self control:

  • Can restrict emotional experiences.

  • May lead to long term regret.

  • Can lead to increased workload.

  • Can be used for ill.

  • Isn’t for everyone.

  • Can lead to long term bias.

Before being full on about “self control” perhaps we should practice some “self compassion”, learn to know and like ourselves, perhaps cut ourselves a little slack and be more realistic.

Read the full paper HERE

I’ll have another marshmallow now please.

…on the other hand, life can be good.

A contrast from yesterday’s blog where I said that many people who work as clinicians are not suited to the job, have made decisions for the wrong reasons and are unhappy.

Dentistry is rewarding in many ways, if you get the design of your job right – and I’ll talk about that tomorrow. It pays relatively well – especially in early years, it is challenging both intellectually and physically, has social kudos, it provides ways of stimulating your interest in different areas as time progresses. There are opportunities to be your own boss, to build a business or businesses, you get to work as part of a team and above all you get the thanks and respect of your patients who you are able literally from cradle to grave.

Take a look at this recent survey from US News about highest paid and “best” jobs and see where a dental degree might take you. I am aware that most of my readers are in the UK (& Ireland) and the reason that I have used this link to help you to see what might, could and should be possible for you to achieve with your degree.

But, and its a big BUT, and at the risk of using a cliche, you must think, look and act outside the box. The climate of fear, in the UK especially, is dividing the profession, helping to keep people down and constantly looking over their shoulder for the next problem. Those who want to serve their patients, who get involved in successful clinical and therefore, business relationships will flourish. Of course there is a need for personal and business resilience to safeguard yourself. Of course you need strong and effective systems to ensure that you can serve your patients to the best of your ability.

Personal and business success is achievable in any country, any jurisdiction and any health system but it will not be delivered on a plate, it takes time, dedication and hard work – if you’re willing success will come, if you’re not then prepare to be disappointed. 

 

The Monday Morning Quote #584

“Your net worth to the world is usually determined by what remains after your bad habits are subtracted from your good ones.”

Benjamin Franklin

 

 

Success?

Thanks to Roz Savage for pointing me in the direction of Colin Beavan who asks powerful questions and has made me examine the way I live my life.

 

The Monday Morning Quote #574

“Excellence is the ultimate in selfishness.

There’s no higher high than great performance at anything.” 

Tom Peters

Carl Richards’ Newsletter – Forget working hard. Try resting hard.

I read and enjoy several dozen (or more) Blogs / newsletters which I should share more often. Carl Richards is a Certified Financial Planner and creator of “The Sketch Guy” column which has appeared in the New York Times since 2010. His website is “The Behavior Gap” (sic) and here’s the Link

He wrote an excellent book “The One Page Financial Plan” which is well worth a read if you wrestle with money.

Here’s his most recent newsletter which may well strike a chord or two.

I couldn’t agree more.

Hi Alun, Carl here. 

I’m tired.

Like, really tired.

And I’m tired of being tired. 

Up at 5 in the morning? Tried it! Daily workouts? Yep. Paleo, bulletproof, gluten-free, cold showers? Check. 

Build a business, start a side hustle, dominate Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook? Yeah, I’ve done all that too.

You know what I don’t understand? How come nobody ever talks about rest? 

You know, rest. As in, relaxing. Doing nothing. Getting a good night’s sleep. That stuff’s kind of important, too… 
… 
I know I’m not alone here. 

The last 10 years have felt like the #CrushIt decade. Every time you turn around somebody is on social media talking about how they’re crushing something. Gary Vaynerchuk wrote the book on it, and according to him, people “need to work harder. And faster. There’s really nothing else to it. I’m exhausted every day, but I’m making all sorts of things happen in my 18 hours.”

Sorry, Gary. But I disagree. I don’t need to work harder and faster. And neither do most of the people reading this. I have a feeling most of us are already working hard enough. 

And you know what else, Gary? Being exhausted every day sounds like a stupid way to live.

… 
Look, if this doesn’t speak to you, just toss this email in the trash and forget you ever saw it. Crush on.

But if it does speak to you, if you’re nodding your exhausted head along knowingly, then consider this message my permission to make this the year of resting hard.

I don’t care if the year’s half over. Start now and keep going for 12 months. This year we’re going to be as good at resting as we are at crushing things. We’re going to become pros at turning off social media, getting great sleep, working less, and living more.

Seriously. Give it a shot. Start today. What do you have to lose? A handful of Twitter followers? A contract? A bit of income?

What you have to gain is a) peace, b) clarity, c) more time for your friends and family, d) not dying of a heart attack or an aneurysm at the age of 50.

Chances are, you don’t need a cup of coffee and a slap in the face. More like some decaf herbal tea and a hug.

Sound good?

Great. 

Enjoy your rest,

-Carl

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